Conversations with My Son

Me: Sir, you need to share your toys with your sister.
Him: But...
Me: Sir...
Him: There. I gave her a canon, 'cause canons are good for babies.

Me: Sir, why did you yell at me?
Him: Because you told me to go in my room and I didn't wanna go in my room and I was SO angry!

Him: What are we going to have for a snack at sister's Girl Scout meeting?
Me: I don't know.
Him: Is it poisonous food?
Me: No, sir. I'm sure it won't be poisonous.