Why My Blog Will Fail

Google "mommy blogs" sometime. There are bazillions of us babbling through our keypads. We write about what brand of yogurt we like, what color we painted our kitchen chairs, and, of course, how adorable our kids are. For every parenting opinion, you can easily find a blogs both defending and defaming it. We are spank swear-ers or spank sneer-ers. We are heart wrenching and honest or charismatic characters. We try to be funnier than the next blogger so you will read again or to sell you more products so we get them free. Some of us blog to keep in touch with out of town family, while others of us blog anonymously. We are a symphony of female voices bellowing different tunes.

How can my small voice be heard above the din?

Honestly, it probably won't be. And I'm fine with that. My blog, according to blog standards, will fail.

Here is why:

1. I am too cheap to advertise. I rely on you readers to find me on your own, instead of spending money on advertisements. Blogging is a hobby, and I. can only afford free hobbies. 
2. I am too flighty. Every bit of advice I've read on blogging tells me to narrow my focus. I'm doomed. I have no focus. My mind is wandering to my monkey bread recipe right now.
3. I'm too green to be brown and too brown to be green. True, my husband is a farmer. But, as I like to joke: This ain't Charlotte's Web. While I'd love to have a self sufficient, eco-homestead, we are far from it. The cows are not organic. The horses are glorified field ornaments. We don't always remember the goats' names. And don't get me started on the chickens. We live in a struggle between who I'd like us to be, who Bubba'd like us to be, and who we can afford to be.
4. I am not a cook. I cook, but I couldn't tell you the difference between a Bearnaise and a braise. I can never be a foodie, especially with my aversion to cheese.
5. I am a hermit. Most mom bloggers have mom blogger friends. Some friendships they've forged in the anonymity of cyberspace, while others start blogs with like minded, real life friends. I am on my own online.
6. I secretly fear going viral. It would be awesome for a bunch of people to read something I wrote. However, I am scared of becoming a punchline without knowing it. I am a fan of self-deprecation, but "self" is different than strangers.
7. I have no idea what I'm doing. I am not a computer person. I don't understand what happens to my e-mail after I delete it. I have clicked  phony links steering me unwittingly to porn. I don't know what it means to have "data" on my phone, but I know I don't have any.

I started this blog to write. I've always wanted to be a writer. Because of this blog, I have written more in the last two years than I did in the seven years before that. I have done what I started this blog to do. I am writing.